Remembering
by MissFictionPrincess
Summary: <html><head></head>Set sometime after "Doomsday" with the Doctor remembering Rose and Rose remembering the Doctor. The songs are Vanilla Twilight by Owl City and After the Storm by Mumford and Sons. Possible sequel involving The Beatles.</html>
1. Gone But Not Forgotten

**Hello all you brilliant, wonderful people! I decided that I wanted to do a Fic based on a song…so then I chose Owl City's **_**Vanilla Twilight**_** because it's very nostalgic and sad. So then it came to me…**

**A/N: I don't own the song or Doctor Who. Props to Adam Young because he's fantastic.**

_The stars lean down to kiss you  
>And I lie awake and miss you<br>Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere_

The Doctor walked to the chair by the consol and slumped down, completely defeated. He didn't want to look weak (even though there was no one there to see him) but he couldn't hold back the tears that were sliding down his face. She was gone. His beautiful, brilliant, fantastic Rose. Gone.

'_cause I'll doze off safe and soundly  
>But I'll miss your arms around me<br>I'd send a post card to you dear  
>'cause I wish you were here<em>

He couldn't ever see her again. No more laughing at jokes only they knew. No more smiles. No more hugs. No hand to hold. No Rose. Time Lords weren't supposed to fall in love, especially not with humans. That was just the rule. Well he had broken that rule beyond repair. And the worst part about it was he hadn't even told her.

_I'll watch the night turn light blue  
>But it's not the same without you<br>Because it takes two to whisper quietly_

He sat there waiting for something to happen. Nothing did. There would be no showing off wonderful places. No snuggling that they both knew was more than friendship. No cups of tea, no chips, no running from dangerous creatures, no adventure. Nothing. Emptiness.

_The silence isn't so bad  
>Till I look at my hands and feel sad<br>'cause the spaces between my fingers  
>are right where yours fit perfectly<em>

Sure, there would be other companions. No one would ever come close to Rose. No one. Not ever. No one could say so much without saying anything at all. If he was upset about something, all it took was her hand in his to make him feel better. They were perfect for each other.

_I'll find repose in new ways  
>though I haven't slept in two days<br>'cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone  
><em>

Every memory hurt. Every memory haunted his every thought. Sometimes, he would go into her room, sit on the floor, and remember everything that was Rose. He couldn't stop himself from letting the tears run down his face. This was stupid. Time Lords didn't cry. _Yeah? Well they do when they lose their favorite person in the entire universe._

_But drenched in vanilla twilight  
>I'll sit on the front porch all night<br>Waist deep in thought because when I think of you  
>I don't feel so alone<br>I don't feel so alone  
>I don't feel so alone<em>

He remembered everything. Most of the memories made him smile sadly, but others made him regret things he had, or rather, had not, done. He thought about the times when they had hugged; best friends caught in something that lasted slightly too long to be plutonic. He thought about the time she had gotten mad because she thought he would leave her. He thought about that horrible day when he hadn't said "Rose Tyler, I love you."

_As many times as I blink I'll think of you tonight  
>I'll think of you tonight<em>

He landed the TARDIS and walked out to one of his favorite places in the universe. The sky was dark blue and every star was visible. He had taken Rose here once, excited to share this place with his friend. She loved it as much as he did. They had curled up to watch the stars glitter billions of miles away, perfectly happy to take a break from running for awhile.

_When violet eyes get brighter  
>and heavy wings grow lighter<br>I'll taste the sky and feel alive again  
>And I'll forget the world that I knew<br>But I swear I won't forget you_

He looked up at the sky and smiled. Somewhere, in a parallel universe, Rose Tyler was alive. If he couldn't protect her himself, he would settle for her being safe in an alien-free world. She was alive. He would never forget her. Her name would keep him fighting.

_Oh if my voice could reach back through the past  
>I'd whisper in your ear<br>Oh darling I wish you were here_

She was gone, that was true. No one could replace her. But he would be alright. He wanted her back, but he would be okay.

**Writing that made me sad. Thanks for reading and please review!**


	2. This Isn't Goodbye

**Thanks to intrepidfish for giving me the idea to write this**__**from Rose's point of view too. This is set right after the Doctor says goodbye at Bad Wolf Bay. As usual, I don't own Doctor Who. I also don't own the song. Shout out to Mumford & Sons for their music.**

_And after the storm  
>I run and run as the rains come<br>And I look up, I look up  
>On my knees and out of luck<br>I look up_

Rose stared at where he had been. She felt no shame in crying her eyes out. Her Doctor. Made for her quite literally, seeing that she had caused his regeneration. All gone. She ran. Ran down the beach towards her mother. _He can't be gone. He said he would never leave me. He's not gone._ She couldn't convince herself.

_Night has always pushed up day  
>You must know life to see decay<br>But I won't rot, I won't rot  
>Not this mind and not this heart<br>I won't rot_

Before the Doctor, Rose had had the most normal the world knew. Every day was wake up, go to work, eat chips, come home, and start over tomorrow. He had shown her the universe. There was so much out there that he had been so excited to show her. She would never know now.

_And I took you by the hand  
>And we stood tall<br>And remembered our own land  
>What we lived for<em>

All those years ago, in that basement when she had first met him, she thought he was fantastic. He had grabbed her hand and told her to run. Now she stood on a beach somewhere in Norway with no hand to hold, no one's arms to snuggle into in a more than plutonic way. There was no one to grab her hand and say "Allons-y!" She thought about sitting in the chair by the consol in the TARDIS, watching the Doctor "fix" things that weren't really broken. He always tried to look impressive. Rose had rolled her eyes then, but he really did impress her. She choked out a laugh through her tears.

_There will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears  
>And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears<br>Get over your hill and see what you find there  
>With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair<em>

She loved him. She had even told him that. She would never know if he felt the same. All he had said was "Rose Tyler-" then he had faded away. Her eyes burned with tears as she thought about him fading into nothing. She wanted to run to him and hold him as close as possible but now she couldn't.

_And now I cling to what I knew  
>I saw exactly what was true<br>But oh no more  
>That's why I hold<br>That's why I hold with all I have  
>That's why I hold<em>

She held onto every memory. She remembered the way his hair stuck out at every angle, the way he smiled, the way he hugged her after some dangerous adventure, both happy to be alive, the way he looked when he put on those glasses that made him look…_brilliant_. She never wanted to let go of those memories, and she never would.

_I will die alone and be left there  
>Well I guess I'll just go home<br>To God knows where  
>Because death is just so full, and mine so small<br>Well I'm scared of what's behind and what's before_

She didn't know what to do. She didn't really remember what normal people did. All she could think of was running from aliens, milling about on the TARDIS, and laughing with the Doctor at their silly jokes. She was half afraid it was all just a wonderfully vivid dream. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and listen to his hearts beat. She tried to swallow the lump in her throat to no avail.

_And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears  
>And love will not break your heart but dismiss your fears<br>Get over your hill and see what you find there  
>With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair<em>

She took a shaky breath and looked up at the sky. _Somewhere. Somewhere out there, he's waiting for me. Somewhere out there in the real world, he's finding a way to bring me back. _She had hope.

_And there will come a time you'll see, with no more tears  
>And love will not break your heart but dismiss your fears<br>Get over your hill and see what you find there  
>With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair<em>

Losing him hurt. It was like a part of her had died. But she knew that he was looking for her and he would see her again. She was going to make sure of that. If there was anything that Rose was, it was persistent. This was not goodbye.

**Sadness. :( Thank you for reading and please review!**


End file.
